The small town of Hudson, Michigan must feel uncomfortably intimate these days (chaffingly so, if you will) for city manager Steve Hartsel. The civil servant recently admitted to on-the-job indecent exposure for jacking it while driving a city vehicle in broad daylight.
On the afternoon of December 22, 2010, a woman witnessed a man masturbating in a minivan adjacent to her while they were both stopped at a red light.
Identifying Hartsel from a lineup would have been unlikely, since his face, unlike his genitals, was partially obscured from view. As luck would have it though, the stick-shifter's City of Hudson municipal license plate was clearly visible at the rear of his shaggin' wagon as he sped off.
Wruh Wroh! Miscalculation or cry for attention?
When officials linked him to the vehicle and questioned him regarding his involvement, Hartsel initially denied the allegations, telling police that the woman must have seen a submarine sandwich in his lap.
HA! That's your alibi?! You pooped in the refrigerator? And you ate a whole wheel of cheese? I'm not even mad, I'm kind of impressed.
Hartsel eventually admitted to police, “She saw what she said she saw,” apologized for his actions and swore off all future road-pleasure.
Lucky for this showboating gent, no charges have been filed as of yet, though his actions are slated for review at the next City Council meeting scheduled for January 18th. I really hope somebody YouTubes that shite!
Oh, also, Hartsel is a retired U.S. Navy commander who concluded his 21-year Navy career in 2009, so we should probably cut him some slack. Too much time around submarines, I guess.
