Frayser Ladies... you ARE the mothers of these 90 babies!

 

Maury Povich just came a little, and screamed like Ned Flanders over purple drapes, because he now gets to (presumably) reveal the results of 90 paternity tests. Now, I'm not saying that every pregnant Frayser High School girl will need one, but Maury could really use some good programming these days. It is the season of giving after all. Pay it forward, baby mommas!

P.S. Here's another clip of Maury losing his shit when a sad lady wearing a choker necklace reveals how big of a Creep her baby daddy is. Kinda looks like Schwarzenegger in pain from Total Recall, no? Jump to 2:35 to see what I mean.

Does He Cook?

Painting by Ginger James

Online dating is more a source of great entertainment than great relationship discovery. All you do is slap your best (photoshopped) picture up on a purposefully brief, 'intriguing' profile and voila! Men flock to flirt with you as you sit home in your pajamas without so much as brushing your teeth.  

Here's an unedited message I received the other day from a Keeper with the right approach: 

"so this is different, but would you ever have any interest in using a guy as a part time bitch sometime to do chores, errands, foot massages, mani/pedicures, or anything at all you wanted?"

Probably should have taken him up on that.

I bet he posted the same ad on Craigslist. Check out this gem while you're at it.