Lipstick On a Pig

Oh Patti, you did it again. How do you find these winners?

Robin Kassner, like  most  all people, deserves to find compatible love. Unfortunately, she's barking up the wrong tall, uninterested tree this week on The Millionaire Matchmaker. Lady's cougin' hardcore, offering up a big one-two Maserati-Ducati combo in exchange for some knowingly forced attention-affection. 

Keep those showers running people. It's about time to wash away the ICK again.

Sads. Grow up babylady! No quality person is going to say hello to that kitty the way you're acting.

The episode can also be purchased through Amazon.com via the following link: 

Hello Kitty in a One Horse Town

Mugshot Love Chillun

Hide yo kids, hide yo wife, it's baby makin' time at the Gainesville city jail. As a waste of both my time and yours, I figured out what the offspring of these orange hot lovers will look like:

"Yes, but I wanted to do hood rat stuff with mah friend"

This one is from a few years back, though I can't help but post it. He's like the love child of Eric Cartman and George Foreman. You best be grillin' me some sammiches, bitch. Who ate all mah pie?

You mind your Memaw now, Latarian Milton. Don't be a menace to society while drinking your juice in the hood.

These single babies also seem like they might want to do some hood rat stuff with their friends some day. Watch out pepaws, girls got moves!

Apparently that last dance was choreographed for Creepers.

You got a little schmutz on that face for radio, Ted Williams

I bet this guy was the life of some kick-ass barrel fires!

Seriously though, I hope 2011 is good to Ted Williams. I'm happy that his video is going viral, his sign was way too small.

UPDATE:  Ted's in high demand! The NFL, amongst other organizations, is currently scouting the homeless hero.