Dirrty Dancing with the Stars: Argentina Programming FTW!

Sarah Palin might have a shot at the presidency if Bristol tried something like this. She also might end up pregnant again.

Disclaimer: NSFW! (But you're not really working right now, now are you?)

Kim Jong-Il Looking At Things

I once had a staring contest with Kim Jong-Il. Needless to say, I was arrested. 

Check out this website for other exhilarating stare-offs!

Perhaps he's going for Jedi Warrior, like the ones in The Men Who Stare At Goats. Is he trying to crush things with his mind-vice? Hard to say, but the evidence is mounting...

...............................................................................................................................

This post is dedicated to my friend Kathleen, since it's her birthday and she also likes to look at things!

And also, big thanks to iZak for turning me on to this Kim Jong-gem!

Sunday Secrets

I like to send relevant Postsecrets to friends and family on Sundays. This one seemed pretty appropriate for this forum.

:)

Also, I'm always happy to see someone spreading the  overconsumption  retail therapy gospel!

Double Dream Hands, For Your Health!

Bring your thumbs to yourself on this one when you consider who should learn this choreography. Crank it!

Shoulder.

Chin. 

Shoulder, shoulder, shoulder.

And somehow, this just feels like it should be paired with our old friend Dr. Steve Brule. Enjoy!

Update: Check out the mash-up!

He's Mr. Blowup, He Pops Out Of Balls!

Fetishes run the gamut of human creativity. I don't really get this one, granted I don't "get" most of them. My expert analytical skills, however, lead me to conclude that Mr. and Mrs. Blowup are experiencing, oh let's call it, Womb Nostalgia.

Mr. Blowup naturally conjures Mr. Bucket imagery. Let's revisit. Oh, and I looked up the lyrics for greater insight (see below). I'm sure Mr. Blowup strings together some choice phrasing of his own during his alone time.

"I'm Mr. Bucket, toss your balls in my top

I'm Mr. Bucket, out of my mouth they will pop

I'm Mr. Bucket, we're all gonna run

I'm Mr. Bucket, buckets of fun!

I'm Mr. Bucket, balls pop out of my mouth

I'm Mr. Bucket, a ball is what I'm about

I'm Mr. Bucket, we're all gonna run

I'm Mr. Bucket, buckets of fun!"

Wow! Creepers!

Kudos to iZak for the tip!

De-compositions

Firstly, play Edith Piaf's music while browsing these images!

Loving the work by Chinese artist Ju Duoqi, self-proclaimed homebound-housewife/hermit. Her thoughtful use of vegetables and organic material to re-imagine famous compositions is darling. The horse's face above, SO cute! Keeper!

Check out the rest of her work on display at the Galerie Paris-Beijing.

Racist Pastries?

Duncan Hines had to pull this YouTube ad campaign recently. Bet you can't guess why! ...cough, throat-clear, blackface. The director, Josh Binder, generally produces some fun, surrealist inspired work, but obviously "Hip Hop Cupcakes" was a bit of a miscalculation.

Let's let Jon Stewart and Larry Wilmore weigh in:

Is Blackface Ever OK?

Actually, Binder's work is somewhat reminiscent of the animations by PES, though PES is much more consistent and creative with his use of materials.

 

While we're on the subject, here's a smattering of some other racially insensitive gems brought to us by Josh Binder and the ad industry at large:

That last dude is a total Creeper!

Oh, and this one, while not racist, isn't for the squeamish:

Epic Spill - by Josh Binder

The Millionaire Matchmaker Goes American Psycho!

 

Seriously? The shifty eyes, the leering, the uncomfortable touching/questioning/body positioning/coercion...

Q-Tip is like the love child of Patrick Bateman and Uncle Fester. These guys are out of control Creepers!!

You must watch, but make sure to keep a bar of soap nearby to wash off the ICK!

You can also purchase the episode through Amazon.com via the link below:

Chance to Support a Great Cause!

Please check out the efforts of our good friends at the South Oakland Shelter in Royal Oak, Michigan!

They are working hard to ensure happy, healthy holidays for families struggling with homelessness.

If you are able to, please consider a contribution to help fight homelessness!

Holiday Contribution Wish From the SOS Director

Homeless kitten photo via fugly.com

$10,000 Hand Jobs

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No Cash4Goldballs

Dear Mr. Goldballs -(Stop)- Please Stop -(Stop)- Sincerely Cash4Gold -(Stop)- Really -(Stop)- Stop.


I LOVE that this shit is framed! Hah!


UPDATE: Well kids, turns out Santa and Haberny's gold balls have more in common than we first suspected. The too-good-to-be-true follow-through suggested in the Cash4Gold letter, was in fact, TGTBT! Well shit. That's certainly a disappointment.

The Consumerist confirmed that Greg Haberny conceded that he was merely engaging in a battle of artistry with the company, conceptual (him) vs. extortion (Cash4Gold). Guess this is a different kind of joke follow-through, which I can appreciate, but I'm still disappointed.


Don't worry though, we'll always have this:

Prettay, Prettay, Prettay Awesome

 --> :) <--

From Russia with Technicolor

Beautiful images of a century old Mother Russia. Instantly transported. Love it :)

Oh, and let's follow this up with a clip of Jon Stewart discussing coverage of US-Russian nuclear weapons policy. Why? Cause those images, while beautiful, are pretty much what I'd expect a "radioactive socialist utopia" would look like. Pretty much.

This Is a Sport?

Ladies are rocking some sweet moves (jump to 2:43). It's like one of those trippy music visualizers - somehow I can't look away.

Below are the alleged 2007 National Champs  break dance fighting  precision roller skate dancing to a jewelry commercial.

And this guy should probably be in the Olympics.

Instrumental Pop Covers!

Bed Intruder Song arranged for tsugaru shamisen! So good.

And below, violin! People are great.

Also check out this guys Cee Lo cover! Keeper!

"Put your mental burden in my mind-vice, and I will crush it."

Jack Donaghy, voice of the future?! Perhaps if Google and 30 Rock have their way.

Google's acquisition of Phonetic Arts brings hope to the masses who have suffered grave miscommunication as a result of butchered Google Voicemail transcriptions. The Googquisition will also allow for more rapid development of realistic speech synthesis and state-of-the-art prank phone calls.

I wonder if Real Dolls are next on Google's hit-list of conquests. That would surely make for an interesting coupling of technologies aimed at the rapid development of functionalized and realistic synthetic girlfriends. Certainly one must examine the motivations driving new technological breakthroughs.

P.S. Kudos to those of you who, like Liz Lemon, use your friends as your therapist. Not only do they take your insurance, but the money you save can go to actual (retail) therapy. I even made up a jingle about it...

"Retail Therapy, you get somethin' for your money!"

Somebody needs to auto-tune that shit!


Disclaimer: The Real Dolls site is NSFW, nor is it safe for anyone with an aversion to graphic images of synthetic human bits.

Know what these things have in common? They're funny.

"I told'ya bitch!"

via Married To The Sea

I've seen this lady in the grocery store.

via NatalieDee

Mom sent this one...

 She lost track of the source.

Rolling In The Deep

I really like her.

Keeper!

Jeggings Are The New Jorts

 

As you know, in fashion, one day you aw in, the next day you aw ouddt. I'm sorry jorts, you aw ouddt. Avidazen.

And now on to Conan, a trendsetter with the winningest combination of orange hair and the graceful legs of a gazelle.

Seems you never-nudes might have found a new base layer!

I want to go to there

Meet The Mirrorcube. The way cooler-than-your-childhood-fort offered up by the Swedish team at Treehotel. If you are interested in what sounds like the most fantastic, albeit pricey vacay, hop on over to the idyllic northern town of Harads (population 600), just 60 kilometers shy of the Arctic Circle!

And don't worry, over stimulation is more likely to set in than aerial cabin fever. Check out the exhaustive list of local adventure options for the winter/spring and
summer/fall seasons!

Now, there may be some of you out there like myself, whose only prior exposure to cubical dwelling is in the form of a corporate office or a traumatic cinematic prison (à la Hypercube). I have not personally tree hugged that far north, so I cannot guarantee that Mirrorcube is not in fact the product of a complex, high-tech conspiracy set upon preventing the escape of those trapped within.

It probably isn't though.

Once again, the subject begs the fundamental question: Keeper or Creeper?

Well (she says smugly), I don't know of anyone who has returned.

Yes!

New favorite cat video! We mustn't forget a shout out to our old friend Surprised Kitty, however.

Minutes of fun!

Happy December!

I Hope This Gets To You

Fantastic creative video love letter! Watch and learn ladies and gents <3

On second thought, maybe this is a bit Creeper though, no?

Feminist or Fembot?

Airport security checks make some people's heads explode, especially if they're robots or reinforced with metal bits. That may be why retired dental surgeon Tammy Banovac (née Tammy Lynn Brewer) took great care to avoid further inspection. That, or she was trying to establish that both common sense and common courtesy were switched off in the TSA protocol monkeys. Kudos to her for some serious follow through and body confidence, but check out the Creeper fembot stare around the 0:39 mark!

And speaking of Creepers, coxing children to comply with TSA pat downs by calling it a game is certainly the wrong approach. While our world probably does contain it's share of wackos who would hide dangerous objects on a child's person/in their tiny pants, it seems we might need to listen to Helen Lovejoy on this one.

What's that you say, overenthusiastic Indian Dwight Schrute? You want to go out for coffee/chai/beet juice?

Oh man, I feel a little bad putting this one out there, but I couldn't help sharing. Wink!

Yes. The button on his shirt does say, "Another Year Sexier!" I really wasn't sure whether to let this one's email wash away in my overflowing inbox, or to write back inquiring as to his foray into beet farming.

I'll let you decide on this one.

P.S. All my single ladies, he is "living a balanced life that involves discovering intricacies of Magma, playing in cricket and kickball teams, [and] relaxing and refreshing [himself] with kundalani yoga!"

Disclaimer: Even though our great love story is not meant to be, I'm sure he's a very nice person, and like everyone, is much deserving of love and affection!